(∗Author’s Note: This is a Fancy Phucket story and was also written for an event called Bedtime Stories 2026. This called for a selections which should be three to five minutes long with a scene containing lots of action, since people will be acting it out. There’s nothing to “act out” about a couple people sitting around a table and talking. THIS HAS NOT BEEN EDITED.)
Larisa crept into the hidden chamber. It had taken her a full week to unblock the door. Now she held her torch high to see inside the tomb that no one had seen in thousands of years. Dust covered the floor. Ancient artifacts were piled high around the room. And in the middle lay a sarcophagus. She gasped and rushed to get closer.
She wiped away the old dust and looked at the carved face on the lid. Sharp features, a cleft chin, high cheekbones, and enormous eyes stared back at her. The body showed a bare-chested man in a kilt. So handsome, she thought.
Larisa quickly put her torch in one of the abandoned sconces on the wall and examined the lid. She could exit the tomb and call for help, which might take a week to get here, or she could try to open the lid herself.
She rubbed her sweaty hands on her pants and pushed the lid. By some miracle, it moved. She grunted and kept pushing. The lid slid roughly until it finally fell to the side, showing Larisa the sarcophagus’s contents.
“Oh,” she said, putting her hands on her cheeks.
Inside was a fully intact mummy. So well preserved, the bandages were still white. The face looked identical to the one on the lid. Even covered in the cloth strips, she could make out the sharp jaw and high cheekbones.
“You are the greatest find of my career,” she told the mummy.
She reached in and lightly touched his cheek. The head moved, and Larisa jumped back, screaming. Her hands covered her mouth as she cowered in fear near the door.
The mummy slowly sat up. He looked over to her and said in a deep, gravelly voice, “Thank you for freeing me of my confines.” The wrapping around his head parted around his mouth.
She shook where she stood, staring intently at the mummy come to life. “You’re we…welcome.”
The mummy moved his arms around and flexed his fingers. Next, he tested his neck for movement.
“Excuse me,” Larisa said.
The mummy looked at her.
“How are you…are you…alive?”
“Of course. I was cursed to live this way until they trapped me inside this coffin. Once I find the order, they will help me become flesh and blood like you.”
“What order?”
“It is best that you do not know.”
“How will you become re-hydrated?”
“I must partake in an act of carnal pleasure.”
Larisa’s eyes widened, and she stood up straight. “Carnal pleasure?” She bit one of her knuckles and sauntered over to the sarcophagus. “I can help you with that.”
He moved his head to look her up and down. “I could not ask you to save me twice.”
“Oh, but I want to.” She tossed her hair over her shoulder. “I bet I’m just the person to help. I did find you.”
The mummy held his hand out. She grasped it and climbed into the coffin, straddling his lap. Her hand traced his face exactly as she had tried to do earlier. The cloth felt surprisingly soft under her fingertips.
“How are you so handsome even under these bandages?” she asked.
His dehydrated hands wrapped around the back of her neck and pulled her to him. He kissed her with fabric-covered lips. Long, thin fingers danced over her body, ripping her shirt off her. She freely explored his body while he kissed down her neck.
“What can I call you?” she said between gasps.
“You can call me Mick.”
“Oh, Mick.”
He ripped her trousers off her next, as her hands ventured lower. Reaching between them, she patted and caressed. She rubbed and poked. Then she sat up and started pulling up the bandages.
“Where…is your dick?”
“Oh, it’s right here.” Mick reached between the wrappings near his hip and pulled out his cloth-covered penis.
A new figure entered the room. Waving his hands in the air, he yelled, “Cut, cut. What do you mean it’s right here? Why is your dick not in place?”
Both Larisa and Mick sat up and looked at the man with matching frowns.
Mick said, “Sometimes it doesn’t stay where it’s supposed to, so I put it in a pocket so I don’t lose it.”
“And at no point when you were getting ready to start shooting did you think to put it in place?”
Larisa spoke up. “We could just pretend.”
The man paced back and forth with his hands on his head. “Pretend?” he yelled. “This isn’t soft-core, this is a full-fledged pornography film. I have two cameras pointed at your genitals. You can’t pretend to fuck.”
The director took several deep breaths. “Okay, Mick, put your dick in place. Someone get him a condom. Jesus Christ.”
Mick put his penis in place with a few twists and a loud pop.
The director walked off set and said, “Start back right when he rips off your pants. And action.”
The two started kissing again, with Larisa’s hands wandering Mick’s body. Her hands found his penis this time while Mick fondled her boobs. She slid his cock into her pussy and began to ride him.
“Oh, you feel so good.”
He gripped her hips. “Don’t move so fast.”
“Are you almost there?” She asked, giving him a wink.
“No, you might-“
POP
Larisa jumped at the sound. She looked down. “Did your dick fall off?”
Mick shrugged. “Yes.”
The director walked onto the set again. “Cut. What do you mean it fell off?”
“It’s inside me, but no longer connected to him.” Larisa pointed to the detached penis inside her cunt.
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, why is that a thing?”
“I have an idea. Let’s keep going.” Mick said. “Larisa, you just lean back.”
The director pointed at Mick. “Fine, but this better be good.” He walked off set yelling, “Action.”
“Lean back, baby girl.” Mick gently pushed her away from him.
He grabbed his fuck rod and slid it in and out of her cooter. He twisted and spun it while she moaned and thrust against his hand. Her movements began to rock the sarcophagus.
“Faster,” she said, spinning her hair around in a circle.
He moved his disconnected banana faster, and her movements became wild. She rocked and panted until the entire coffin rolled onto its side, dumping them both out onto the floor.
“Goddamn it,” the director said, running onto the set.
Mick helped Larisa up.
“Cut, cut. I’m calling it. Worst porn in history. Just go the fuck home.” He shooed the two actors off set and kicked the casket. “For fuck’s sake. I should have directed the one with Bigfoot.”
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